Monday, June 29, 2009

Why do people self destruct?
Why do people with everything going for them, self destruct?
Saw three instances last week. One at close quarters.
Scary as hell.
Perhaps one ought to see why so many don’t breakdown despite.
Despite all.
Do we as humans have quotas of what we can take? What determines this?
And some don’t- despite all. Amazing.


Ricercar said...

maybe there are reasons which are invisible? maybe they still dont 'justify' anything, but they are still reasons ...

norrbu said...

Humility and modesty are key ingredients. Two come to mind right away - your very own Sachin Tendulkar and AR Rehman. We must all be grounded at all times.

manuscrypts said...

read a tangential post yday on good and evil... that speaks of a balance that has to happen...
i wonder if the fall is related to losing objectivity..

AmitL said...

'Thoughts become things'.

austere said...

Amitl- glosses over the genetic reasons?

manu- don't know. how were prisoners of war in Nazi camps objective?

norrbu- and what if the reality is godawful? why do some NOT give in?

ricer- and yet. begs the question, does it not? some don't despite excruciating circumstances. Read Man's Search for meaning/ Victor Frankl?

Ricercar said...

funny i glimpsed on the page and saw the genetioc reasons and had a mini shock bcz i am paralelly working on genetics o anxiety and depressin in the tother window :D

Anonymous said...

Everyone has a different threshold, like the threshold of physical pain, plus a threshold for psychological pain. I would rather lose an arm, then have someone near and dear to me betray my faith and loyalty in/to them.

Is is not nature vs nuture. It is personality plus previous expereinces success and failures at learning how to cope with things. Some people never learn the lesson. They don't find their coping mechanism before they reach the breaking point or threshold.

I suffered a lot of cruel things early in life. I learned to leave my body, my "essence of being or self" protected as a distant observer in those unbearable moments.

Now I am a healthy and successful adult, without ever going to counseling or drugs. It is not easy, but possible. It takes a lot of work. I confess, at times I still struggle to stay connected to the world around me, but I know there is no returning if you leave your body for too long.


austere said...

Nimh- Thank you.
I look to the skies with gratitude at having you in my life. You have gale-quality positive energy. The rest- me included- can only fumble to understand.

ricer- in sync?

Ricercar said...

iguess to answer your previous question, technically, my understanding is that you already have a genetic predisposition, but then depending multiple factors including stress, life events, etc, you could or could not develop certain 'things' - lets say, for lack of a more PC or all encompassing word - and a vulnerabilty or giving could just be something like that. just like any other disease or physical abnormality. i have an inherited tendency to be allergic, but i am not always allergic and my sister is never - we dont know she didnt get the vulnerability, there are a million other factors.

i guess what i am trying to say is, it all depends person to person and stress to stress. and also history - because stress accumulates sometimes, doesnt it? so if there will be a break or not depends on how much load there is - but teh load may have contributing factors you cant see, or even lingering impact from past loads that havent had time to heal before the current insult.

oh i dont know. looking back it all sounds to technical, now :)

in sync? yes in my head, everything is in sync - but i lose the sync'n sometimes in explaining :D

Nimh Sellers said...

You flatter me to much! I am no more or less special then other person. We all have a right to simply "be".

I am grateful to have you in my life as well!

austere said...

Hmm. Sounds like its all goes back to Luck by Chance?

Such indeed, is life.

Nimh- You are. :) Because I say so.

quin browne said...

i think we hold in as long as we can, then it seeps out.. or, some enjoy the intense emotional outlet of letting go, self destructing.. and revel in how it makes them feel.

austere said...

quin- seeps out more like, methinks.