I’ve never seen “to be continued” placed as strategically as this, and it makes me wonder if all tbc’s are like this. I’m reading “Miskin’s” concise commentary on the Geeta that appears in every issue of Navneet Samarpan, in the opening pages. So in the middle of the battlefield we have Arjun losing heart, wringing his hands, putting forth one argument after another. Arjun here is described as valiant, the conqueror of sleep, and yet.... And we have the charioteer, Parth, laughing at him And one entire month to wonder why. And ruminate as to whether most of life’s tbc’s are as perfectly poised, teetering on an edge.


“I am…” is fantastic. Real, gritty. Not for the squeamish or faint of heart. All the randomness and incompleteness of life.
My take: In the theater, to see “I am…”
http://blueline.goobertree.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=38&t=22650

My poem on Holi is in In Focus,the newsletter of the California Writer's Club West Valley.

Yesterday I got my copy of the Mass Review. Finally.


A BOOK perfect~
Yesterday, finally the book got here
From wherever that is,
Red brick and college square, spiffy, in my mind’e eye
(photos in catalogs that dot the road not taken)
Though Belgium is what is says on the brown cover
I stare at the label, trace the masthead
think of caravans, and silk routes and loads of myrrh and spice
And breathe in a whiff of the strange places this must have been.

Yesterday, finally the book got here
After I’d panicked and “If it may please your lordship, may I please …”
(supplicated the editor)
Even as I wondered about the Mayflower and therefore the Bostonian royals and protocol
should-nots,
When patience gave way like the ice on a pond that muff-covered women in an old postcard skate on
I’d fidgeted, mumbled and then asked

Yesterday after the book got here,
I traced my name on the back cover
Wondered with a lump in my throat, at its perfectly bound form
Neat orderly rows of gracious fonted letters, marching down the page
Stared at the index, with section titles in latin, and heavyweight contributors,
Agape

Now that the book is here
I shall begin my day
Touching the pages, tracing the gracious curve of assorted alphabets
Trace the smooth loveliness of the art pages, wonder black crayon can do so much
perfection
a gulp in my throat at the beauty of it all
my personal prayer
of reassurance, backbone.

Routines are good.
I end up setting routines for the most mundane things.
The “what-next’s” keep me on track. On the straight and narrow.
Keeps me from over-thinking, is there a word for that.
Or slipping into brooding.
My voice sounds chirpy, a friend says.
A time to rest and a time to get up, a time to get set, a time to run…
Yet, for the difficult stuff there is no time
For the really life changing stuff. Orbital shifts and all that, you know?
I read through the pages, marvel at the work done.
I know it can matter, life-changing.
But I still stay off. Perhaps digging, unearthing is not comfortable.
Today I looked around blogdom, followed links and realized how inward-looking this blog has become.
So be it

last night
at the concert paying tribute to the reclusive maestro of Maihar
but I was there cause you'd have wanted it
(like I do so many things cause you'd have wanted it)
a shower of musical notes
shook up neurons, long asleep
pushed them into high drive
listening to the bihag play out, expansive
flowing,swirling, adding energy with every turn, like the ripples in a lake
the joy of knowing the words to this classical piece,
satience.
yet the ear is alert, waiting for a voice
despite.
fragile times
yet, satience.

(yday was Ustad Allauddin Khansaheb's birth anniversary. today is baba's b'day, or would have been)

MUST READ:
http://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/print/2011/04/stephen-king-on-the-creative-process-the-state-of-fiction-and-more/237023/

Lessons

You stare at the blank screen
Watch the cursor
Pace its blink
And sigh
the story you’ve just read
is perfection, refined
like an artifact in wood some craftsman has perfected, polished, and gone his way.
The master of gore and vampires
Turned to poetry and golden light
Flawless, with a turn of his wrist
And you’re awed.
A chaotic swirl
Of respect-admiration- wistful
Permeate your brain
A golden wash, satiated
With pokey “I wish I could’s”
All you think of
How layered the story was
Crisp and quick
fine
Characterization jampacked in a few quick lines
You sigh
And push yourself to your humble four hundred.

Sometimes you view brilliance.
Three times three claps, like at school?
Sheer brilliance.
The sort that shakes up your mind.
Dhoosar, the movie, is like that.
Life through a blurred lens.
Forces you to think. Think tough. Pokes you.
Unsettles, asks difficult questions.
What if you forgot? Everything?
And never knew you were forgetting?
If memory were an swirling, dancing mist?
Unfunny joker?
What if all the frames of reference, alphabets, phone numbers, colors, mail passwords
Look like gibberish?
Who’d be there?
What if nobody were there?
When reality crumpled like a house of cards, what would you do?
Cause to “do”, you’d need to know reality from your left foot.
What if the next step was a vacuum? And the one after?
So well etched, you don’t need the subtitles. Not really.
The body language of the dementia-afflicted shouts in mute compound sentences and unspoken underlined.
For all this, the aesthetics are perfect.
And classical runs through, tying it all up like a scholar’s knowledge in palm-leaf .
Its only once you’ve rubbed the tears off your face
That the question barrage begins.
When you look at your face in the echoing mirror.



Dhoosar, which means blurred, is the title of Amol Palekar- Sandhya Gokhale’s new Marathi film.
http://dhoosarthefilm.com/

For long now, one has stayed away from the music, at times its wiser this way; but the rich notes in the deepest classical baritone dip and soar, and play on somewhere in the backdrop of one’s brain,and on and on, they play on the emotions like a master pianist running up and down and all over the scales.
And all one can do is watch.

Just back from a quick 2 day trip to Calcutta.
The before and after poems say it better.

Before :
Calcutta
Sweet siren of endless lanes
matriarch of regal arch and dome
I try aloof, but
my blood quickens at your name
(like the beat of a drummer at a puja pandal)
thirty nine years away
is long
far too long to condense
(how later I learned to push into a bus)
into one spare afternoon and a few more hours
perhaps, this is best.
This incompleteness


http://blueline.goobertree.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=38&t=22498

After:
Stern Queen Victoria
Empress of the realm
Still reigns over marble and green
Yet the memory of Mother’s eyes
tugs at me, the many homes
And many lifetimes traversed

My scale changed
Even as the light on the lake
Reflects the shimmer
of many sunsets past

http://blueline.goobertree.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=38&t=22520

Rohinton Mistry nominated for the Booker!

(Do not miss that exclamation mark. Yes, I am thrilled. Been smiling to self all mornin’)

*Such A Long Journey* (which is his only book that I’ve read so far, thanks to the Mumbai University ban), is intricate, brilliant, astounding, the kind of book that shakes the heebie-jeebies out of your mind, sets long dusty neuron ends buzzing again, makes you sit up straighter and sigh with hundred-proof envy.

Just the book to read ensconced in the environs of an ICCU waiting room, seated on the bench that forms perimeter of your scared domain, even as the world goes about the ebb and tide of its business. Just the kind of book that transports you in a microsecond from sticky, rexin-covered, shaky bench to the hustle and bustle and social buzz of a Parsi colony in Central Mumbai.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rohinton_Mistry

http://januarymagazine.com/profiles/mistry.html

That tax credit that you fought for, and I'd said, let it go?
Well, you got your refund, sir, with interest.
I'm bright eyed. I sit taller.
Looks like a message from beyond the pale. Stand your ground and fight.

Spring 2011 issue of The Massachusetts Review features my translated story, * Lines on the wall*.
The original Gujarati story,* Bhoosavu* is by Shri Pravinsinh Chavda.
www.massreview.org

I reach home-wards, for three days, to handle paperwork.
Must be done before March 31.
Hard road.
What is home? What defines it? And what is not?

from a trip to Tulsi Lake on saturday.
Huge thanks to BNHS. Yes, this is in the National Park in the not-so-distant suburb of Borivli.
I learned to drink in the greens. To breathe again.
Yes, despite the cousin in Tokyo and the mentor in Hawaii.

Sometimes
you keep the words
at a respectful distance
wary.
Of the tricks they can play
watchful
of their moods and whimsies,
And the slips they do on purpose, sly
sound one way and mean another
(when they know you’re not at your best)
Words.
the letters push, pell-mell
a rush hour melee,
of broken font and serifs
mismatched type-families.
yet in the blanks between the letters, you spot
traces of disquiet , forgotten memories
now announcements in bold, underlined,
under spotlight for all the world.
when
the words turn traitor,
Dragging their feet, gluey and reluctant
Sharp, serrated edges stand out like origami
‘Tis wiser to stay aloof

(note: written for the poetry group, I am ok)

A rhyme learnt in kindergarten has taken me so long to understand:

"popat bhookhyo nathi, popat tarsyo nathi
popat amba ni daal; popat sarovar ni paal,
popat majhaa karey.."

A young vagabond parrot, who’s run away from home, trills about the pleasures of the wide world, showing off he is without a care. But ouch, he’s hurting.

Head down, getting on with life
Sticking to a routine helps
Writing helps, the rote of weekly subs and crits at IWW.
But writing poetry, that too a poyemn a day? phew! I’m surprised too.
Walking helps, round and round the park we go.
So much paperwork!
.
Working longer hours.
Getting home after 9 has logic, not much of the day is left then.

Cooking is tough-- the fridge overflows with leftovers.

Anyway, head down and quick march, “popat majhaa karey”

Little one~ I looked hard for you this morning but couldn’t find you; and it’s only sometimes that I spot you now, spinning crazy kathak chakkars in the morning light, or showing off a full velocity,dexterous taan in the afternoon quiet. Peace and hope you’re pampered and happy returns and all that, where ever you are, and where ever it is that we eventually go.

Y’day I grew a difficult notch in my own esteem, a pat on the back is in order, as is sitting up straighter.

A month ago, this very day.

Frostwriting features my essay, a tribute to the Practice group on IWW , (and to my friend Alice in particular)
www.frostwriting.com/issues/article/three-dots-and-a-full-stop

Strong? No, not me.
Pokey-holey; this façade.
Like cardboard. Edgy.
Do not touch.

From the formal quiet of the 34th floor meeting room, the sea stretches to a misty distance, an uneasy sheet shimmering with serene pools and rivers of quiet, past which are lands inhabitated by souls. And the foyer at the Gateway holds an invisible cloud, like a second skin, of all the chaos that once transpired. And Dilli‘s Terminal 3 is fine, only its in the wrong country. And so on.

Somewhere, amidst this schizoid existence, the mind registers.

In the light that flooded past the golden curtains that afternoon.
In the rush of the river carried you ever onwards.
I saw you.
Today, I resumed walking, watching the sun light up your beloved green.
But even the strays were lost